What Women Really Want - From a Man

Men and women are so different when it comes to relationships. "I'll never understand women!" How many times have we heard that from men! Many men are fed up with women that nag and complain or are moody. How would the man feel if they knew that they are the cause and the angry woman is the affect! "But I've done nothing wrong!" Shout the men, "she's just crazy, I do love her can't she see that!"

I want to talk to the women just for a moment.

How many times do you ask your man to do something and it doesn't happen? Do feel that you just can't trust him to do what you ask?

How many times do you wish he would do or say something that makes you feel good without being prompted from you? You know you're not the most beautiful woman in the world but you just want to know you're beautiful in his eyes.

How many times does your man let you down and you have to take control? Do you wish he would just be a man! Sometimes you just want to feel like a woman and be looked after... just sometimes!

How many times do you drop hints with a vain hope that your man will pick up on these signals. Can he not see what you are saying, it is so obvious.

How does all this make you feel? Yes I know, frustrating isn't it?

Now I want to talk to the men.

Does your partner behave in a way you just don't get?

Do you know there is something wrong but you don't understand what it is?

Do you get so frustrated because she just does not make sense, you then argue and that just makes it worse.

I am going to tell you now that women do not think about relationships the way that you do! When you understand what is really happening within her, you will make your life easier and create a brilliant relationship, isn't that what you want? After all, you do love her. Why doesn't she get that?

She is after good emotions that you can help her create. When she is complaining, nagging, or going silent on you, she is giving you a message. You have done something that means to her that she cannot trust you. These little feelings build up in her and before you know it, she has found 20 small displays from you that equal you cannot be trusted and now she is angry.

You do one more thing wrong and your in trouble! To you these are trivial and mean nothing, to her it is now proof! Without trust, she cannot feel secure and it is security that she is after and fighting for. These displays that irritate you have good underlying intentions; she just wants the relationship to work.

Security, security, security! Women crave this from a man and this is your key to success. What she wants is to know that you will always be there no matter what! You have to prove it not just with words but also by actions, continuous actions. She wants to know you will be there for her even if she screams at you, becomes unreasonable, and does not make sense! Well to you anyway! She wants you to be a man because that will help her feel like a woman. When she was growing up, she had a vision of the perfect man, one that would sweep her off her feet and look after her until the day she dies. This is a secure feeling and she craves for it!

When you help her feel like a woman she will stop at nothing to make you feel like a man, this is fantastic for your relationship and is what you are both after.

Top Mistakes Most Guys Make

It is always a good idea to learn the best sexual positions so that you can be a pro in the bedroom. We are going to talk about some of the best positions for you to use. And what mistakes you need to stay away from so that you don't seem boring.

First you need to forget about imitating a porn movie because what you are watching is professional actors and trying to imitate them is going to set you up for big failure. Most porn movies use multiple frames so that it seems like they are making love forever when in actuality they are not. Also some of the positions that you see on the screen are great camera angles.

Second it is important that you do not need to keep your weight off a woman when making love because applying pressure when making love will allow for more stimulation and you will be able to reach a climax faster. Also a woman likes to feel a man on top of her so she fells his closeness and warmth.

Thirdly it is too much to ask a woman who is on top to do all the work. It can be a great position for stimulation because the man can rotate the womans hips and control the movement over the pubic bone. This grinding motion can be a great way to reach a climax and enhances the stimulation.

Remember that it is important to know what works well with you and your partner. It is important to communicate with each other so that you always know what is working and what is not.

What should a husband do to make his wife happy ?

Remember how it was when you first met your wife? During the newness of a relationship, both parties are usually on their best behavior, trying hard to impress the other. Why should that end once you're married or after you've been married for quite some time? Kindness and thoughtfulness should never fall by the wayside. A marriage needs to be worked on throughout the years. Never stop expressing your love and devotion for each other. Keep the flame lit and your wife will be happy!

SHOW APPRECIATION

Above all, every woman needs to be shown appreciation and acknowledgment for her talents, abilities and endeavors. Never take her for granted. Always remember good manners, even with your wife. Telling her "thank you" for a wonderful meal or acknowledging her accomplishments, will go a long way in making her happy and feeling appreciated. In turn, this will give her incentive and motivation to always be at her best for you.

LISTENING

Always be willing to listen, with genuine interest. Her thoughts, ideas and opinions are important to her. They should be important to you as well. After all, she's the one you chose to spend your life with. Why wouldn't her ideas be of importance to you? When she's able to voice her concerns or share ideas, it makes her feel important in your eyes.

Why You Are Not In The Mood For Sex

Your life is moving on pretty fine. A good marriage with children to crown it, a good career and good health. But something is amiss somewhere, your sex drive. You can fondly recall your once vibrant sex drive. However, of late, your libido is no longer there. It has simply disappeared without trace, not even the latest sexy moves can locate it. You are not alone as a good number of women suffer from an under active sexual disorder which makes them not to be in the mood for sex. It is ironical but using hormone based contraceptives can actually lower your libido. The very same pills that are supposed to give you a license and leeway of romping as you please. However they make you feel not in the mood for sex. These are birth control contraceptives like pills, rings, patches and injections. They actually lower testosterone levels and for some women this depresses and lowers their libido.

It might be possible you are stressed. There is nothing that depresses libido better than stress. Combining your career, your family and your private life is an uphill task. You are literally juggling through a maze and in due time you will be lost. Trying to beat deadlines while at the same time being there for your family is a delicate balancing act. It only ends up giving you stress. You become overwhelmed by your multitasking skills. This multitasking works to your advantage but takes a heavy toil on your sex life. In your efforts to reduce the workload on your items list, sex is often the first to be scrapped. Most women spend a hectic day in their jobs, cook, feed and put the kids to bed after work. Do the dishes and make lunch for the following day. Sex is the last thing on their mind. They are not in the mood for sex. They are long asleep the moment they hit the pillow.

Lack of enough sleep disrupts and interferes with sex hormones namely progesterone and estrogen. However more important to be noted is that lack of enough sleep makes you quite irritable for sex. You are simply not in the mood for sex. You feel you need enough time to catch up on your sleep. Grogginess leads to irritability. It becomes worse if its your partner's rattling snore that is robbing snooze time out of you. You will be more inclined to smother him with a pillow than with a kiss. Your mates bad sleeping habits might make you to sleep elsewhere. It is quite difficult to maintain intimacy in such conditions. It justifies why you are not in the mood for sex.

Top 10 Ways to Satisfy Her

1. Make it Sexy

Satisfy her psychologically by boosting her confidence and making her feel sexy. Keep your relationship fresh by flirting. She likes to feel sexy. She wants to be desired and chased. Give a sly smile and wink. Show her that she still does it for you. Whisper in her ear the ways she turns you on. Build her sexiness confidence, then suggest some actions that you find especially sexy...

2. Touch Her

Satisfy her skin with affectionate touch and sensual caressing. Whether it's part of foreplay or simply a little PDA, she enjoys feeling your touch. Men are generally less touchy feeling than ladies. Indulge her need for touch with hugs, snuggles, kisses, hand holding, caressing etc.

3. Write a Love Note

Satisfy her questioning mind. Let her know the reasons you love her. Tell her what you admire about her and all the reasons you fell for her. This is a sentimental gift that she can read over and over again. Try making a top 10, 50 or even 100 reasons list. It can be juicy and romantic, or light hearted and fun. Affirm her best qualities and share your heartfelt feelings. Let her know why she is the perfect match for you. She's sure to melt at this lasting romantic gesture.

4. Compliment Her

Satisfy her by increasing her physical confidence. In a day and age where sex sells, we are bombarded by amazing looking women on TV, in magazines, and on the internet. With such amazing competition, women can feel slightly inadequate. Let her know the things you love about her. Be sincere, she knows she is not perfect, but she wants to know that you are attracted to her.

5. Flowers, Chocolates, and Teddy Bear

Satisfy her emotionally with romantic gestures. The traditional flowers, chocolates and teddy bears will make her feel special, and soften her up. If you want to do something less predictable, get creative or put your own spin on some of these romantic gestures. A good rule of thumb is- the more you give, the more you get...

6. Massage

Satisfy her tense and tight muscles. Start with her feet and work your way up, or with her scalp and ease your way down. Your touch will not simply relax her. Touch is stimulating and energizing. Many massages have turned in to foreplay and stimulated some steamy lovin. Which just goes to show that one good deed, deserves another.

7. Jewelry

Satisfy her material desires. The old saying goes "diamonds, that'll shut her up". It doesn't have to be diamonds thought. Ladies love jewelry. One piece of jewelry is almost always the solution for any relationship problem. A piece of jewelry is worth a thousand words; I'm sorry, I love you, I screwed up, Let's work it out, Just because...

8. Spice It Up

Satisfy her senses. Add some variety to your intimate times together. Share your fantasies (or part of them) with each other and make them come true. If she is comfortable add some adult accessories to your love making. Experiment and share. Find out what really satisfies her...

9. Help Her with Housework

Satisfy her needs so she has energy to satisfy yours. As the popular book title goes "Sex starts in the Kitchen". Many women think it is hot when a man cooks or cleans. It shows a sensitive side, that you are in tune with practical matters, and that you are willing to do whatever it takes to get to dessert...

10. Take Your Time

Satisfy her slowly and sensually. Although men are ready anytime, anyplace, most women are not ready at the drop of a dime. We've all heard men are like microwaves, women are like slow cookers. Slow things down and increase your foreplay. Play sensual games or experiment with sensual oils. Make your loving last longer.

I wanna hold your hand

Hand-holding signifies closeness and a sense of appreciation for your partner and relationship. This emotion can be triggered by, say, a walk in a beautiful location or witnessing a special event like fireworks or a celebration such as a wedding.

Let the mood move you. Take your partner's hand in yours, entwine your fingers and give their hand a little affectionate squeeze, just to remind them that you're there and there's no place else you'd rather be.

Perfectly acceptable any time and any place, including in front of future parents-in-law or at church, taking your partner's hand in yours has a timeless charm that, far from repelling the general public, actually evokes feelings of admiration and longing.

Some folk don't like having their hand held in public. Guys, particularly, can feel emasculated by such a "girly" act, preferring to drape a big, strong arm around their lady's shoulder. Same, but different.

Your Partner's Toes And Wanting More

Do you know just how it easy it is for a man or woman to get frustrated with their sex life and go elsewhere looking for satisfaction? Let me tell you, it is very easy! You may love your partner with all your heart, but if the sexual passion is not there, it just won't last long. I have found that the book titled Curl Your Toes "A Couples Guide To Breathtaking Sex" to be one of the best I have found on improving your sex life.

It is so frustrating to lie beside your partner in bed and thinking that if you have sex, it will just be the same old boring sex you have been having for years. There are many books and articles out there on improving one's sex life--some are good, some are useless, and then there are some that are GREAT!! Curl Your Toes "A Couples Guide to Breathtaking Sex" is one of those GREAT books! It will change your life--you and your partner will be very spoiled! I was truly amazed at some of the methods in this book--things I had never dreamed of and what's really amazing is...They Work!! Read for yourself and see exactly what I mean when I say you don't have to settle for boring anymore! I know you will not be disappointed--I sure wasn't!

So, go ahead! What are you waiting for? Read, learn, and have fun putting it all into practice!!

How To Wear A Bra With Style

Just because you wear a bra every day doesn't mean you know how to put one on correctly. If you put on your bra by hooking it underneath your breasts and spinning it around so that the closure is in the back, you're putting on your bra incorrectly.

According to the experts at , the correct method of getting into your brassier is as follows:

1. Adjust the straps to the maximum length.
2. Lean forward into the cups and rest your breasts into the supports.
3. Reach behind to hook the bra on the middle hooks of the closure.
4. Put the straps on your shoulders.
5. Position your breast in the cup by slipping a hand into the cup and lifting the breast while aligning the underwire on your ribcage along the natural crease of your breast to prevent pinching of the breast tissue.
6. Tighten the straps so that they support the breasts lightly without cutting into the skin or putting too much strain on the shoulders.
7. Adjust the straps every time you put on a bra.

How Your Health Affects Your Sex Life

Experts agree: There is an important relationship between overall health, overall lifestyle, and sexual satisfaction. Research also suggests that certain physical conditions that go along with obesity also affect sex drive, further dampening the desires of those who are overweight.

The good news: You can make some lifestyle changes to enhance your libido, experts say. Those changes include:

• If you're overweight, lose a little weight (even 10 pounds) to stimulate sex hormones.
• Eat more nutritious foods, which control cholesterol and blood sugar levels. Choose heart-healthy foods such as grains, fruits, nuts, vegetables, and lean sources of dairy and protein.
• Exercise regularly. To strengthen your heart and help build endurance, add a few high-intensity bouts to your fitness routine. Strength training is also a good idea, to build shapely muscle and to keep your body strong enough to handle all your day-to-day activities (including sex).
• Get enough rest. It's hard to be in the mood for love when you are exhausted!
• Keep a positive attitude. Accept your body, whatever its size, and believe in your sensuality.

Get Help If You Need It

Although small changes in lifestyle -- along with some healthy "self-talk" -- can go a long way toward improving both drive and desire, if you still are experiencing sexual problems, professional help may be in order.

It's not as simple as getting a prescription for Viagra; sexual problems may be physical or psychological in nature, and can affect both men and women.

If the problems are persistent, or cause distress for you or your partner, it's time to see your doctor for evaluation and treatment.

How Can newly married Please his Wife?

Well first off, congratulations on your marriage! Hopefully with my help, your honeymoon will be one unforgettable sexual excursion! If you really want to satisfy your woman, you have to make sure you take the time to pleasure her every fantasy! You should start off slow and romantic, and gradually work your way to foreplay. As a very sexually active woman myself, I know I love when my man gives me all the attention and licks me from head to toe!

You want to tease her until she is begging for your long shaft inside of her! As far as how long it takes before you ejaculate; try changing positions whenever you feel like you’re about to blow your load. You can also consider masturbating before intercourse to increase your stamina! Good luck, and write back anytime!

Morning sex for a healthier you

NOW we have the perfect excuse to get down to some steamy sex in the morning – it’s good for us.

That’s because sex uses every muscle group in the body and gives the heart and lungs a high-octane aerobic work-out.

It burns around 300 calories an hour.

And a good session at least three times a week boosts the heart, halving the risk of a heart attack or stroke, a study at Queen’s University in Belfast has discovered.

They say regular sex also boosts circulation and keeps down blood pressure.

Sex twice a week is the perfect COLD CURE as it boosts IgA – the immune system’s first line of defence, according to a study in New Scientist.

But don’t overdo it – sex more than three times a week LOWERS our defences.

Moments before orgasm, levels of the feelgood hormone oxytocin surge and flood the body with powerful endorphins.

These natural painkillers help ease everything from arthritis to migraine.

A steamy session also means we feel less stressed as it inhibits production of the hormone cortisol.

And, because it provides a calorie-burning work-out and helps maintain a healthy weight, it will reduce your risk of diabetes too.

An American study of 300 sexually active women whose partners did not use condoms found they were less likely to have depression.

Researchers think that is because they absorb the hormone prostaglandin, which is only found in sperm.

But do not try this if you are not in a stable relationship – a sexually transmitted infection is a recipe for depression.

An orgasm will release a surge of oestrogen, which can relieve the pain of PMS.

Researchers at Yale School of Medicine believe it could also help prevent endometriosis – a painful condition where the tissue which should line the womb grows in other parts of the pelvis.

Apart from the benefits of the work-out, sex boosts the production of testosterone.

This hormone is associated with stronger bones and muscles so may help fend off osteoporosis.

Sex also increases the output of oestrogen and other hormones that make the hair shine and skin glow.

And, according to NHS Direct, “if you are worried about wrinkles – orgasms even help prevent frown lines deepening”.

Characteristics of Healthy Relationships

1. Each person allows for the individuality of each partner within the relationship.
2. Experiencing both oneness with and separateness from their partner. Other relationships are seen as no threat.
3. Bringing out the best qualities in their partner.
4. Each partner has the ability to accept endings, if necessary.
5. Experiencing openness to change and exploration both in the individual and in the relationship.
6. Inviting growth in their partner.
7. Experiencing true intimacy in the relationship physically, intellectually, emotionally, and spiritually.
8. Feeling the freedom to ask honestly for what they want.
9. Being able to experience giving and receiving in the same manner.
10. Not attempting to control or change the other person.
11. Encouraging self-sufficiency of others. Adults don't need each other in a dependent fashion. They simply want to be with each other.
12. Accepting limitations of self and partner.
13. Not attempting to seek unconditional love in relationships. This type of love is really parental love. Parents accept any behavior from a child and will still love and accept them. Adults demand to be treated with dignity in order to stay in a relationship.
14. Able to accept commitment.
15. Each person having a high self-esteem.
16. Trusting the memory of the beloved, enjoying solitude.
17. Expressing feelings spontaneously.
18. Welcoming closeness, risking vulnerability.
19. Able to care with detachment. They don't feel responsible for each other.
20. Affirming equality and personal power of self and their partner.

How to Hint for a Kiss from a Guy

1. Look Approachable. If you put him at ease and let him know you enjoy being with him, he'll usually find the courage to try to kiss you.
2. Break the "touch barrier." Touch him lightly on the arm or shoulder when you're talking. Just make it a quick, innocent touch and don't make a big deal out of it. Holding hands is also a good way to break the touch barrier. The simple act of touching can strengthen the intimacy between you and him. Sometimes a guy will break the touch barrier, and if you're comfortable with him doing so, touch him back. But don't wait for a guy to make the first move here, because girls can generally get away with breaking the touch barrier earlier in a relationship than guys can. Also another good way of breaking the touch barrier is to "compare hand sizes" then smile and lace your fingers for a moment. This is a cute way to "break the barrier.
3. Look at his lips. When you're alone with a guy and want to be kissed, make eye contact and then move your gaze briefly down to his lips. Then move your eyes back up to meet his and smile demurely. You don't have to be really obvious about it. Many guys will take the hint, especially if they've read one of the many articles that lists this as a sign that a girl wants to be kissed. If it doesn't work the first time, try again when the time is right.
4. Move in. You have to be close to each other to kiss, and the less distance a guy has to travel to kiss you, the easier it is for him to give it a try. So get close. When the moment seems right, put your face close to his and look at him expectantly. If you're brave, you could try moving in as though you're going to kiss him. Hopefully he'll take the hint and kiss you, but if he doesn't you can give him a playful little kiss on the cheek.
5. Talk about it. If the guy isn't taking your subtle hints, bring up kissing in conversation. For example, if you're watching a movie together and see an on-screen kiss, mention that it's "so romantic" or something to that effect. If the guy is really shy, you might just want to put it on the line and tell him that you'd like him to kiss you.
6. Kiss him. There's no law that says the guy has to initiate the kiss, and some guys--especially if they've never kissed a girl before--just won't take your hints. If you want to kiss him, just go ahead and do it.

How to Remove a Hickey

1. Apply an icepack to the hickey as soon as possible after receiving it. You can wrap some ice in a towel, use pre-frozen ice packs or put a spoon in the freezer for a few minutes. Gently hold the cold compress to the skin for several minutes (up to 20 minutes, if it doesn’t feel too uncomfortable), remove the compress for several minutes, and then apply it again.
2. Try the toothbrush or comb method. Many people swear by it, but it’s important to remember that a hickey is a bruise, and they just take time to disappear, so don’t expect a miracle.
   • Lightly brush the hickey and the area around it with a stiff-bristled toothbrush or a comb. Doing this breaks up the blood clot and gets circulation going again.
   • Wait about 15 minutes. The redness and swelling will spread, but will be less obvious after about 15 minutes.
   • Apply a cold compress, as above.
   • Repeat if necessary. Depending on the magnitude of your hickey, this method may work or it may just spread the discoloration a bit (pressing too hard can make it worse.)
3. Conceal the hickey with makeup. The most effective is green-tinted concealer, as it's designed to negate red skin tones. Apply a foundation (one a little lighter than your skin tone) directly on and all around the hickey so it's not obvious you’re concealing something. Try an eyeshadow that’s lighter than your skin tone if sans concealer.
4. Cover the hickey. Wear a turtleneck, scarf or collared shirt or blouse (dress appropriate for the weather!). Style your hair (if it's long enough) so it hangs over the hickey. Frequently check the positioning of the covering agent, ensuring it still hides the hickey.
5. Use a coin. This method is probably the most painful, but has proven VERY effective. First, stretch the skin flat (pulling away from the hickey on two opposite sides). Then, use the edge of a large coin to scrape the skin. Use the coin like the hickey was butter on toast, and spread outward. The only difference is that you must press quite HARD (as hard as you can, but not so that you break the skin, bleed or hurt). What this does is push the excess blood, which has escaped from the capillaries, out of the surface skin. There will be redness from the scraping, but that will go away much faster than a hickey. Anyhow, a scrape is much less conspicuous than a hickey.
6. Put a spoon in the freezer for a few minutes. Apply pressure and slide the spoon along the hickey. The pressure and coldness help disperse the blood that has formed. You will need to repeat freezing as a warm spoon is useless. You must use a lot of pressure with the spoon but should see results over a few minutes of doing this.

How to Sweep a Girl off Her Feet

1. Strike up a conversation. If you haven't met her yet, find something unique about her or the situation the two of you are in and say something about it. If she's a friendly person this should give you enough to talk about until you can start asking her questions to get to know her better.

1. Find something about her that is truly special. Does she have anything about her that is unique? A subtle little quirk or feature that you find endearing, but that no one else seems to notice?
2. Let her know that you think she's special without expecting anything (a phone number, a date) in return. If this girl is really interesting to you, there should be something far from the common that you notice. If she's good looking, she probably gets several compliments a day, so offer her one that is as unique as you believe she may be, like mentioning something about her personality - first impressions will make a huge difference. For example:
   
   
   • "Hi, I don't mean to make you feel weird or anything, but you've just got the prettiest freckles I've ever seen."
3. She'll probably smile, say thank you, look away, and maybe even blush. Remember that even if ultimately, it doesn't work out, you've at least made her day by giving her a true compliment.
   • Try to walk the line between a feel-good compliment and a cheesy pick up line. Be sincere about it, but don't go over the top.
4. Offer her your company, and walk away. That is, right before you leave, give her your phone number or screen name, or offer a time and a place to meet, and let her know that if she chooses not to take you up on your offer, you'll never bother her again. Don't give her a chance to accept or reject you. Make your offer and run. Give her a chance to think about it by herself, and wonder "Hmmm...I wonder what he's like." If you do this confidently and impressively, she'll feel compelled by her curiosity to get to know you better, and she won't feel like she's being pressured or chased. Also, the fact that she might never see you again will encourage her to follow up on any glimmer of hope she has about you being the guy of her dreams.
5. Don't look back. If she doesn't call or show up, leave her alone. She's not interested, and if that ends up being the case, don't take it personally. However, if she does call you or meet with you, you've probably swept her off her feet! The rest depends on chemistry and compatibility. Good luck!

How to Hug

1. Approach the person. Depending on the person's relationship to you, you might want to approach differently:
   • Family Hug: Approach kindly, but not too emotionally.
   • Friend Hug (girls): Approach caringly, sometimes humorously, and smile.
   • Friend Hug (guys): Approach quickly, usually not looking them in the eye.
   • Crush Hug: Approach carefully, but do not seem shy. Smile slightly and perhaps say a caring word or two.
   • Lover Hug: It doesn't matter who starts this; either can make it just as romantic. When approaching, put your hands on their shoulders and look them in the eyes. Say you love them, how much you care for them, and how much you are loving every second with them. Then fall into each other and hug with all your heart.
   
2. Embrace.
   • Family Hug: You can keep talking when hugging; it will not ruin the momentum. Where you place your hands is not important; the hugged won't think it over too much. Press gently; it is not necessary to have head-contact. Stroke your hands quickly across the top of the hugged's back. Smile when letting go.
   • Friend Hug (girls): Close your eyes and think about how much you love your friend when hugging. Press as much as you feel like. (But don't squish!) Do not clap the hugged on the shoulders or such; its too masculine and some girls think you don't like them if you do it the guys' way.
   • Friend Hug (guys): Embrace strongly, and clap each other on the top of your backs. If it's an emotional moment, keep in the hugged position for a brief moment and do not clap each other's backs.
   • Crush Hug: Press the hugged warmly towards you. If you are a man, remember that it is more masculine and more protective to fold your arms under hers. Her arms should be around your neck, and you should be embracing her around the waist. When pressing her against you, you can lift her up a bit, pressing her chest and upper stomach against yours. Keep it in that position for a while, and then let go. Look her in the eyes when you separate and continue the conversation naturally.
   • Lover Hug: 1) Males: Carefully sliding your hands down from her shoulders, put them on her waist and slide them around her lower back. Put your head on her shoulder and press her towards you for as long as you like. If you want to, you can give her a small massage with your hands, and try to warm her. When separating, you can look into her eyes, smile genuinely and, if the situation is fitting, kiss her. 2) Females: Extend your arms toward him and hold them around his neck and shoulders. Lean as close as possible and press your torso against his. In situations of extreme intimacy, interlocking your leg in his is appropriate. Avoid holding your arms below his shoulders and/or embracing strongly and tensely.
3. Don't hug too tightly. The best way to judge how tight or loose to hug is to let whomever your hugging tell you by how hard they squeeze. If they are soft, be soft back; if they like bear hugs and squeeze tightly, do the exact same back (but don't suffocate him/her).
4. Don't be the first to let go. If someone hugs you, they may want a long, loving hug (maybe they are upset or down), so just go along with it and hug them until they let you go. A hug is a great thing and lots of people like them, as they can feel great and greatly improve your mood. However, if both of you have read this, neither of you will let go and you will be forced to continue hugging indefinitely, or simply appear rude. Perhaps you should get someone to pull the two of you apart after several moments.

How to Hug

Hug, Hug Me Do

Why do women want to be hugged? Now there’s a real puzzler.

For such a simple gesture, hugging sure does need a lot of demystifyin’. And while men often wonder about one aspect in particular - why on EARTH hugs are so important to women - these same women, ever conscious of the unidirectional nature of their need, prefer to examine it in every. single. possible. way.

How to ask a boy for a hug (hold out your arms, and if he asks what you’re doing, reply: “I want a hug!”*), and how to do that without embarrassing yourself (hint: get a wing man).

Their knowledge extends to boyfriends (How do you get your boyfriend to hug you? Stand there with a really cute look on your face, like you’re expecting something from him… If he doesn’t hug you, cry. If he still doesn’t hug you, dump him) and husbands (How do I hug my husband? Start with a beer and just let him know you’re there); the shy (How do you give a real loving hug if you’re shy? Start slow) and the passionate (How do you hug passionately? Really mean it when you hug).

(* If he doesn’t ask, assume he thinks you’re impersonating Superman. Escape the ensuing awkward moment by telling him you’re practicing for the upcoming comic books convention. And then try to escape that awkward moment.)

Part 2: Hug protocol

Hugs are harmless, right? A gentle expression of support or comfort or affection. So are they always appropriate? The Wise Ones say… it depends.

For instance, what does it mean when a 30-year-old woman hugs a 14-year-old boy a lot, and should it be happening? (unless she’s family, probably not). Should you hug a guy after you’ve broken up with him and it’s time for him to move out? (sure. You’ve spent a part of your life together with good memories and it’s a tough decision to make; you will surely miss each other).

Even if the hug is appropriate, the logistics might not be (chuckle chuckle…). If you’re, say, 5 feet tall and the person you’re hugging is 5′8″, where do you put your arms?

The protocol is strangely silent about the ideal way to hug a guy around his friends and what to do if a girl sees her boyfriend hugging another girl and gets mad. Maybe you have some ideas of your own.

Part 3: Five things you always wanted to know about hugging

1. How can you avoid makeup stains? Use a translucent powder to set foundation; it will help keep it from coming off on white shirts during a hug.
2. Why do dogs jump at people when they hug? The dog’s jealous. Make it a group hug.
3. Why do people rub or pat your back when they hug you? Since you asked… they rub because they care, and they pat because they’re uncomfortable.
4. Can you become pregnant if you hug a guy? Yes, but it would be a coincidence. In other words, not because you hugged him. In other words… no way. But you knew that.
5. When is Hug Day? January 21. But hugs are great 24/7/365.

What Do You Really Need?

I spoke with a friend who just started a new job she doesn’t like. She really wants to start her own business doing something she’s very good at and enjoys. It’s not a matter of figuring out what it may be, she already knows and has done it in the past.

During our conversation, she wanted to get into the "story" of how the woman who is supposed to train her doesn’t want to teach her anything. My response was, "That makes sense…because you don’t want to learn it. Let go of how she behaves. It’s just a part of the fact you’re not where you want to be or doing what you want to do."

Then she started telling me about how she’s a certain age and what happens to people when they reach a certain age. I stopped her mid-comment and said, "What about instead of stating why your age is involved, you say that you choose to do the work you prefer? How does that feel?" She did get that instead of justifying why she doesn’t want a regular job she’s allowed to say she has a different vision and intention for her life.

We discussed the ad she used years ago that triggered 21 potential clients to call her in 2 days. She was concerned the ad wasn’t good enough. I said, "What if the ad not only ignites the same response, but people see your ad and get excited to see you’re back in business?"

We went back and forth for a while; and though she continued to shift her energy into a positive direction, old patterns of behavior kept creeping in which is something that happens to all of us. And she started to express the concerns many people have about getting everything perfect and aligned before she got started. I asked if her pen and paper were still handy since she’d been taking notes and asked her to write down the following quote from Mike Litman:

"You don’t have to get it right you just have to get it going."

She laughed out loud when I said it. No matter how much planning we do to start a business or project of any size, we’re going to have to adjust and tweak as we go along. And, that’s an ongoing process if we do our business well. We also talked about the fact that "can’t" is a dirty word whereas "won’t" may be accurate.

Another excellent quote I gave her is from Kurt Wright: "Commitment is a magnet." If she’s as committed to doing this business as she says she is, she’ll attract the right people, right jobs, and right ideas. That’s simply how the Law of Attraction works. If she says it can’t happen or it’s difficult, she’ll get that, as well.

What we really need in regard to any area of our lives is the attitude, focus, vision, appreciation, feeling, commitment, and passion to make it happen. And, it helps if we choose to enjoy the ride.

Thinking positively can lead to optimism

Thinking positively can lead to optimism!

The trick is to catch yourself in the act of being pessimistic and change your thinking. This might not come easily, but it's very doable. One way we can train our brain to start thinking more positively is through affirmations.

Affirmations are positive phrases we say to ourselves. Phrases like, "I can become an optimist," for a relevant example, are affirmations. Here are a few more examples:

• No matter what happens, I can bounce back.
• I am a strong, competent person.
• I am beautiful.
• People love me.
• I do excellent work.
• I am successful.
• Everyone has setbacks and I can overcome them.
• If I work hard, I'll get good grades.
• I love myself.

Repeating phrases such as these to ourselves can actually have an impact. You'll find that if you practice affirming with optimistic, confident phrases, your brain will start building new neural pathways. These pathways will start to lend themselves towards positive, rather than negative, thoughts.

IMPRESSION REPETITION ASSOCIATION

(What do they look like) (Repeat their names 5 times) (what do they do)
1. Try to exercise a little sympathy, tolerance and kindness; it goes a lot further than a short fuse.
2. Learn the difference between appreciation and flattery; one is from the heart, the other is from the teeth.
3. Accept the fact that everyone is superior to you in one way or another, and learn from that trait.
4. When not engaged in some definite problem-solving, most people think of themselves 95% of the time. If we could cut it to 50%, the results
would be dramatic.
5. Why should people be interested in you and me, unless we are first interested in them?
6. We are all interested in what we want; be a little different, be interested in what the other person wants and needs (get the other person’s point of view and see things from his angle as well as your own. (Be interested in helping others, not only yourself.)
7. Try to do things without ulterior motives.
8. If we do things that require time, energy, unselfishness and thoughtfulness, we will make many friends.
9. The ability to listen is rarer than almost any other trait. (Listen and learn.)
10. This is an old one- "do unto others as you would have them do unto you; we all know who wrote that one.
11. Do unto others as they would have you do unto them.
12. When dealing with people, use little phrases like, "I’m sorry to trouble you", "would you be so kind as to", "Won’t you please", "Would you mind", "Thank you", they are the hallmark of good breeding.
13. Be wiser than other people if you can, but not tell them so.

A Positive Attitude

FRIENDSHIP IS NOT FREE; IT MUST BE EARNED!

We should try to do these things better:
1. Encourage others to talk about themselves.
2. Talk in the interest ranges of the things that people
treasure most when talking to them.
3. Talk to people about themselves and recognize
their importance.
4. Respect other people’s good judgment and avoid
arguments.
5. Never tell anyone they are wrong, we all will
rationalize to the point of thinking we are
unequivocally right.
6. We should criticize ourselves before other people
have a chance to; if you are wrong, admit it!
7. Tread softly, you will go farther.
8. We should try to let our friends feel as though they
have excelled us at some time or another.
9. Let others do a great deal more of the talking.
10. Figure out why others think as they do; look at it
from their viewpoint.
11. Show compassion to others (this is yearned for).
12. Treat people with respect, dignity, honesty, truth-
fulness and willingness; they will generally
emulate those feelings.
13. Challenge others to do something better, never force them.
14. Call attention to mistakes indirectly (don’t broadcast).
15. Make difficulties seem easy to conquer.
16. Praise minutest improvements; and inspire hidden treasures in others.
17. Be friendly.
18. Force yourself to smile! (you will.)
19. Consider other’s good points.
20. Make others want to follow your suggestions.
21. Always appreciate people’s time.
22. Be interested in everyone you meet.
23. Always remember, good manners are made up of petty sacrifices.
24. Remember names; a person’s name is truly the most treasured phrase to that person’s ears. Use the I.R.A principles to help remember name:
25. Try saying this three (3) times, "Act enthusiastic and you’ll be enthusiastic", it works.
26. Perfect yourself first, then worry about everyone else.

Ways to Learn to Love Yourself

Loving myself isn't something I'm very good at. It takes hard work to look in the mirror and like what I see. It's difficult for me to enjoy who I am. Low self esteem has been something I've struggled with all my life. I have, however, found ways to combat it. I'd like to share these with you in hopes that it will not only enrich your lives, but it might help me a little in turn.

Make lists

Make a list of things about yourself you like. I know this is difficult at first, but it's imperative to identify the things about yourself you like. Here's an example list:

I like myself because...

* I am caring.
* I am kind.
* I am hardworking.
* I like cats.
* I'm passionate about things.
* I'm capable of loving deeply.
* I have cute hair.
* I have pretty eyes.
* I'm a good writer.

Again, this isn't easy at first. I recommend starting with lists of things you like. For example, I like cats, reading, walking, the color pink, etc. If you really like the things you write down, those things make up parts of your personality. You can like yourself just for liking those things, just like you might like someone else for having similar likes.

Smooth talker

How to keep a conversation going

If dating profiles are anything to go by, 'good conversation' is something we rate highly in an ideal mate. So how do you turn stilted small talk into a proper conversation?

Starting a conversation with a member of the opposite sex can be a nerve-wracking experience. Once you've broken the ice, you need to keep the dialogue going, which for some people is ... wait for it ... easier said than done.

If friendly banter is something you struggle with, never fear. Our pointers will help you polish your conversation skills in no time.

Anatomy of a conversation

We've all had a conversation that hasn't exactly gone as we'd have liked. But we can learn from our mistakes. In order to improve your conversation skills, you need to revisit an embarrassing or awkward conversation from your past.

If you had your time again, what would you change? Your tone of voice? The words you used? Keep these things in mind. They are your conversational weaknesses and it is these things you need to work on in order to get your conversation skills up to scratch.

Sealed with a kiss

Why your first kiss is make or break

Have you ever kissed someone you really fancied only to find that after the smooch was over, your feelings towards them had changed? You're not alone, as a new study on kissing reveals.

The kiss off
According to the study of 1041 college students at the University at Albany, 59 percent of men and 66 percent of women admitted that romantic desire for a person had evaporated after a first kiss.

But what happens within the seemingly harmless act of kissing that can turn lust into indifference? Apparently, it's all in his or her kiss.

Unhealthy relationships

We've all known someone who's been unhappy with their romantic relationship. Yet they stay rooted, glued to the status quo despite feeling miserable. Reasons can range from guilt and fear to family or financial commitments.

But there might be an even more compelling reason for leaving than simple ennui — your health.

Two recent studies on relationships and health have shown that sticking it out in an unhappy union can actually make you sick. The effects on your wellbeing can range from general, persistent poor health right through to serious medical conditions such as heart disease.

The crazy way we met

Most of us have those strange almost-met-someone moments: Stuck in rush-hour traffic, you make eyes in the rearview mirror at the cutie behind you… or walking your sister’s dog while she’s out of town, you find the pup, well, strongly drawn to a poodle whose owner is adorable… Often, these incidents don’t lead anywhere, but for some of our lucky readers, they were the start of something very, very good. Read their inspiring stories, and be open to meeting your next honey in a most unusual way.

Sexual Statistics

A businessman boards a flight and is lucky enough to be seated next to an absolutely gorgeous woman. They exchange brief hellos and he notices she is reading a manual about sexual statistics. He asks her about it and she replies:

"This is a very interesting book about sexual statistics. It identifies that American Indians have the longest average penis and Polish men have the biggest average diameter. By the way, my name is Jill. What's yours?"

He coolly replies, "Tonto Kawalski, nice to meet you."

How to say I love you

So, here’s a true and pathetic story—with a happy ending, not to worry.
Way back, when I first started dating my now long-term beau, he left a message one afternoon on my voicemail, which ended with: “Gotta go. I love yyyyy — ummmmm — errrrrrr. Have a nice day.”
Yes, my beau had started to say “I love you”—then stopped abruptly. His subconscious, it seemed, wanted to say those words. But for some reason he couldn’t get them out—not even after five months of exclusive dating.
I found this especially troublesome since my beau’s speech impediment was not my dating norm. My last ex had swiftly said “I love you” — after a mere three weeks of dating — and then he couldn’t stop blurting it thereafter. I’d say: “We need more toilet paper.” He’d respond: “I love you!” But despite his words, my ex’s daily treatment of me didn’t communicate love as much as the desire to make me his, his, his (talk about jealous types!).
Possibly the most important vocabulary lesson to be learned about the words “I love you” is this: Your actions must always be in sync with these words—or they become null and void!
In my current beau’s case, I fully felt his love expressed daily through his actions. He was always clipping articles for me he knew I’d like. Recharging my cell phone at night. Bringing me chicken soup when I was sick. And yet saying this simple three-syllable phrase “I love you” remained a big tongue-twister for him.
Once I walked into the bathroom while he was applying his shaving cream.
“Are you trying to see what you’d look like with a big white beard?” I teased.
“Yes,” he replied, “This is what I will look like when I’m 75 and with a beard—and I hope I’m facing you then, too.”
My beau seemed to be emanating “I love you” at me. So, why couldn’t he just come out and say it? It seemed as if his subconscious wanted to tell me these words — hence why he told me “I love yyyyy —” …Right?
So I asked him bluntly. He answered honestly.
His definition of “I love you” meant, “I promise to never leave you (and might even want to marry you some day) — but the last woman I loved, I married — and that relationship was a total train wreck!”
The happy ending news from all this? Although it took longer than I expected for my beau to say “I love you,” when he finally did say it, those words meant far more to me. With all this in mind, here are some tips for saying those three little (but so big!) words.

1. Don’t rush to take that “I love you” out of the box—because it’s hard to get it back into the box after it’s blurted. Be sure you really mean it when you say it.


2. Recognize some people take longer than others to say “I love you”—and usually these people are “male” people. In general, women take longer to get ready for parties. Men take longer to get ready for relationships. And it’s not good to rush either along.


3. After you’ve said “I love you,” continue to share out loud the specific traits and habits that you love. Don’t just coast on this generic phrase or you will chew all the flavor out of it.


4. If you’re wanting to hear “I love you” and it’s not a-coming, it might not be for lack of love, but out of fear. Engage your partner in a conversation about what these words mean for each of you. It’s a great opportunity to talk about your fears and long-term desires—and who knows, it might get those words jumpstarted.


5. Don’t say your first “I love you” during a time of intensity—be that either making love or making war. If you say it during sex, you may just be swept up in temporary passion. And if you say it during a fight, you might only be doing so to gain control. Ironically, the more neutral the time and setting in which you say your first “I love you,” the more impactful it will feel.

Getting over an Affair

Ques:- How do I get over an affair I should not have had in the first place? He is married and so am I. I see him all the time and the old feelings keep coming back.

Ans:- Find a way to not ever see him again. Move if you have to. I think the healing needs to cost you something so you will never be tempted to do this again. Whatever it takes. Do your spouses know about this affair? You need to be in marriage counseling with your husband to find out what you two have that can make for a solid marriage and work on it. Strike the Original Match by Swindoll is a place to start. Get Five Languages of Love and decide what your love language is so you and your husband can meet each other's needs. You get over the affair by wiping the slate clean.

Dating Games

Dating games: As far as we're concerned they’re part of every relationship, so get used to them. Of course, some dating games are just harmless ploys used to uncover information about a potential partner, while others are selfish attempts to manipulate and subjugate. There are two ways to look at the issue of playing dating games in the relationship world: Either identify and learn how to react or do nothing and get continually played by the women in your life. We want to address the former approach, with a special emphasis on why girls play dating games and how you can easily turn them around and use them to your advantage.

Hard to get

You know this one: She comes across as completely ambivalent about any romantic possibilities with you, yet makes sure to say just enough to suggest she’s actually up for it. Keep in mind that the girl who plays hard to get does it because she can afford to. She has any number of interested suitors and she wants to see how badly each of them wants her. It’s one of the most common dating games around, but that doesn’t mean you should be fooled by it.

Teasing

She tantalizingly hints at sexual episodes and then retracts them when the time comes to get down to business. This dating game is nothing more than a means to gauge your level of interest or to remain in control of a blossoming relationship. She wants to be the one who dictates the pace of things, and why shouldn’t you let her believe that’s the case?

Inspiring jealousy

In this dating game, she flirts hard with other men right in front of you, making it abundantly clear that she is not yet yours to possess. She might do this to make you squirm or she might want to see if you’re the type of guy who gives up at the first sign of trouble. Either way, she plays this dating game to provoke a reaction from you, and you need to make sure that your reaction says one thing: I’m no sucker.

Jumping through hoops

When a woman plays the "jumping through hoops" dating game, she actually has the calculated nerve to put you through a series of trials in order to see how far you’ll go for her. She makes ludicrous and whimsical requests like asking you to go to the shop and get her a pack of Skittles (and then pick out the green ones when you get home). While you’re out, she might even phone one of her friends to tell her how tight she’s got you wrapped around her little finger. Don’t let this dating game happen -- ever.

Alternative Cancer Treatments

Cancer is a scary word. If you haven't experienced it firsthand, it's almost certain that you know a family member or a close friend who has. With the many forms that cancer can take, there are a number of treatments that go along with them.

Depending on the type of cancer in question, modern treatments usually include surgery, chemotherapy and radiation. Due to the pain and side effects of these treatments and their related drugs, there has been a surge of interest in learning about other therapies that can be done concurrently. Coined as "complementary" therapies, these techniques aren't to be confused with stand-alone alternative cancer treatments. Instead, they are forms of holistic healing that can improve a cancer patient’s quality of life by focusing on their physical, spiritual and emotional needs.

AskMen.com does not endorse or advocate any of these suggested alternative complementary treatments. They should always be discussed in detail with a medical professional or a certified holistic health practitioner.

Massage therapy

Thermo therapy

Hypnotherapy

Aromatherapy

Modern Love

Q: I've met a man who's 37 and he's quite interested in me. I like him but have no clue as to why he wants someone so much older. Some of my friends have mentioned that they've also experienced this situation; they get attention from younger men but rarely from those our age. I'm divorced and, ideally, I would like to find a long-term relationship again. Should I encourage him, or would it likely be a waste of time? He's never been married.

Are you afraid his attraction is only a boyish fantasy? It may be. But I find that younger men are often genuinely attracted to an older woman's self-acceptance and enthusiasm about life. Take comfort in knowing that you're part of a trend. In a recent survey AARP found that one third of older single women who are dating have a younger partner.

As your friends are noticing, women enjoy attention from younger men for the same reasons that many people seek partners who are at least a decade older or younger: it can be refreshing to spend time with someone who isn't facing the same fears, challenges, and hang-ups as you are. This motivation is also in the mix when a middle-aged man dates a younger woman, even though society often chides this as a purely physical pursuit.

Who are the women you think your young admirer should date? Most are either frantic about their biological clocks or single parents trying to establish careers. If he doesn't want children and doesn't want to be immersed in those concerns, what stops you from being his ideal choice?

You know the obvious downside. You grew up with Howdy Doody and he grew up with Scooby-Doo. But that's not why you wrote to me. So I'll answer the questions you wanted to ask but didn't.

First, will he enjoy his Mrs. Robinson fantasy for a while and then drop you for a younger hottie? In my experience, no. In fact, he's at equal risk of having you break his heart.

Second, will he run you ragged? I doubt it. In the couples I see with big age differences, the woman almost always has more energy than the man does.

Third, if your relationship crashes, will people think you're a fool and say, "We told you so"? Maybe. I don't know your neighbors. But you can't escape gossip and avoid all risk and still enjoy living. And, frankly, life is one big country music song, so why pretend it isn't?

Instead of fretting about the rest of your life, answer this: are you interested in this guy? If so, proceed with pleasure. Encourage him. As long as you're both rational and both know all the usual caveats that apply in dating (regarding lifestyles, values, income, etc.), there's no reason to run.

If you must think long-term, remember that women live longer than men do. You two may be more in sync than he'd care to imagine.

Living Healthy to 100

It was sunrise in the village of Hojancha when Tommy Castillo and I mounted a pair of bikes and whizzed downhill from his pink wooden house into the steamy Costa Rica morning.

Our route took us by the town clinic, past a mechanic where the rhythm of local cowboy music blared into the street from tinny speakers. With truants’ delight, we swooped down another hill past the village school, and from there, the houses thinned out. On one side of the road, buildings gave way to a wall of jungle. The road dipped to where the pavement bridged a creek and continued up a steep incline. Tommy, wearing a white-toothed grin and a Yankees baseball cap, stood up hard on his pedals and pulled ahead of me. I was breathing heavily. Sweat trickled down my back.

Off the main road, our wheels traced parallel ruts past a horse barn and a vegetable garden. The track ended in a clearing with a raised chicken coop, a tin-roofed wooden house, and a woodshed stacked high with split logs. Out front, a woman wearing a bright pink dress, hoop earrings, and carnival beads vigorously swept the jungle floor, sending up a dust cloud. Behind her, a few long golden pencils of light angled through the trees.

Experience Pure Love and Forgiveness

We can spend most of our lives on trivial issues. But Jesus Christ reminds us what really matters and what we really need. Our greatest felt needs are to be loved, forgiven, whole and alive. Do you feel compelled to somehow respond to Jesus’ death on the cross? Do you feel compelled to enter deeper into the experience of Christ’s forgiveness?

That feeling is no accident. It is a divine appointment.

Love. It's what we all want. To be loved is the most amazing thing that can happen to you.

But not just love - unconditional love, pure love. Do you wonder if anyone can love you as you truly are? Why is pure love so hard to find? Maybe it's because we keep looking in all the wrong places.

Maybe you have looked for love in your family. You have tried your whole life to please them and make them happy. But it was never enough.

Maybe you have looked for love in a physical relationship. You tell yourself, "If I share my body, I will feel loved." But you never do.

Maybe you have looked for love in popularity. "If everyone knows me, then I will feel loved and accepted." But that's a game you can't always win, and when you do, you are still lonely.

Where can you go to feel completely accepted? Where can you look to find unconditional love?

There is only one place where love never disappoints. The picture of pure love is found in God. God is love. But how can you know God loves you? How can you see it?

Through Jesus Christ, we see love at its purest. Jesus said, "Greater love has no one than this, that he lay down his life for his friends" (John 15:13). The picture of pure, passionate love is caught in the frame of Jesus loving you while hanging on the cross.

God made His love visible in Christ. And Jesus showed that love is measured not merely by feelings, but by sacrifice.

How can you know pure love? Imagine asking Jesus, "How much do you love me?" He would stretch out His arms, with His nail-pierced hands, and say, "This much."

You can experience His pure love.

8 Ingredients To A Healthy Heart

While it’s easy to get caught up in the aesthetic component of creating a good workout and nutritional program, you really must not overlook the importance of exercise and healthy eating when it comes to maintaining good health. Even more important is ensuring you have a healthy heart because cardiovascular disease is rising at an increasing pace.

While there are certain factors you simply cannot control, such as a genetic predisposition to heart disease, there are some you can and should control. The sooner you start taking measures to prevent heart disease, the better you’ll fair later in life.

That being said, here are the top ingredients you need to keep your ticker working the way it should, as we take a look at the eight ingredients to a healthy heart.

1- Cut back on red meat

2- Up your consumption of dark-colored fruits and vegetables

3- Control your insulin levels

4- Make your own meals

5- Up your soluble fiber content

6- Reduce your cheese intake

7- Drink in moderation

8- Do intense exercise

Mental Health For Men

Mental health for men is being called a silent crisis, a sleeper issue that has crept into the minds of millions. At the heart of the problem are new and emerging pressures for men, stemming from changes in societal dynamics at work, and in family and personal life.

While the concept of mental health for men is nothing new, comparatively, gender-specific health awareness and research have focused predominately on women. Women have the tendency to band together, and they are more vocal and expressive about emotions and other aspects of their mental health. As a result, women seek health care in much greater proportion than men. Men, on the other hand, traditionally shy away from the health-care system, and we are only now starting to understand why that is.

Men tend to view partners and friends as primary health sources. When they do reach a physician, men tend to focus more on physical problems, and are less likely to discuss deeper emotional issues -- particularly if the physician is female. Perhaps most influential are perceptions around male masculinity. As it is seen unmanly to discuss weakness, mental issues become masked and often go undiagnosed.

Recognizing these barriers is only the first step to overcoming illnesses that might be weighing on a man’s mind. Greater understanding of new and emerging mental illnesses for men is equally as important, and hopefully the following will help to raise your awareness.

Ways To Keep Fit And Stay Healthy

You may have heard the expression, “Once an alcoholic, always an alcoholic.” In the same way, you could say “Once a coffee addict, always a coffee addict.”

But before I go any further in telling you my story about coffee and all the whys and hows of quitting it, you should now that now is a good time to quit drinking coffee.

You've been eating mostly well, you eat your fruits and vegetables, you've been reading Frederic's newsletter - but you think, “a little cup of coffee once in a while isn't that bad.” Plus it's good for the mood.

But I'm telling you right now that that cup of coffee, which I'm sure you're enjoying more often than you'd like to admit it, is preventing you from achieving the levels of health you desire.

12 Affordable Ways To Good Health

1 Sleep earlier.
2 Consider vitamin supplementation.
3 Eat more vegetables, cut down on red meat, caffeine, sugar and salt.
4 Never skip breakfast
5 Never eat an incomplete meal.
6 Don’t let yourself go hungry.
7 Exercise, and at the very least, just walk.
8 Don’t stress out.
9 Wash your hands often.
10 Toss the vices.
11 Think twice about joining weight loss programs.
12 Visit your doctor for annual tests.

Romance Novel Love

Like most women, I'm a sucker for romance.

I love Valentine's Day, flowers, jewelry, and dinners on the town. I like to read novels by Francine Rivers and Jan Karon, and I even sneak a peek at the final episodes of dating shows like "The Bachelor," hoping unrealistically that someone might just find lasting love with a camera stuck in their face.
In fact, when I was eleven years old, I voraciously read every book in a series of teen romances. And as a budding author, I naively thought, "I could write one of these!" I ended up writing two. The title of my titillating novels? Magical Daydreams and Someday, Somewhere (gag!). I had no luck getting them published--not enough life experience with the subject matter, I suppose.

But I still held out hope that I would have my own romance someday, and I prayed for a Prince Charming. Imagine my surprise when that answered prayer and I had our first fight in the car, driving away from our dream wedding! He wanted to stop and clean the car of its "Just Married" debris--from top to bottom. I was ready to hose it down quickly and get to our destination, which was still an hour's drive away. Our second fight, which took place a week later in our newlywed apartment, was about how to organize the refrigerator. Can you say "obsessive-compulsive?"

Masturbation Techniques

Men have been taking care of "business" since the dawn of time, and many have devised strategies to enhance the experience -- somewhat. Without discussing the basics -- the Basic Fist and Basic Thumb and Forefinger, which no doubt you are all well aware of -- let’s delve into some more "advanced" masturbation techniques.

It has to be noted that many men may find it easier, faster and more effective to masturbate instead of putting in the time and effort to enhance their sexual relationship with their lover. Masturbation, however, should not replace a healthy sex life with a partner -- to do so is to lose out on the intimacy of closeness, and the effort and reward of a mutually beneficial relationship.

Studies show that, chemically, masturbating is 400 times less effective at satisfying ones sexual appetite than sex with a partner. Nonetheless, masturbating is certainly a favorite and pleasant pastime of men and women alike, and is a great way to enjoy and learn about yourself.

There are many ways to get yourself off, and with Male Appreciation Day in mind, here are some masturbation techniques you may not have played around with just yet.

Pelvic thrust with wrist

Deep scrotum massageWringing

Butt spread

Milking

Signs You’re A Sex Addict

Sex addiction can involve many different sexual antics; it may be a strong desire to have sex, masturbate, watch porn or flirt. A person is defined as a sex addict when his behavior gets out of control and starts to have a negative impact on his life. These feelings and behaviors cause a great deal of shame, hopelessness and confusion for the sex addict. These feelings are also normally accompanied by denial, despite it being an unmanageable problem in the sex addict's life.

Sexual addiction takes up a great deal of energy, and you know you’re in trouble when your behavior causes relationship breakdowns, job problems, legal issues, and a loss of interest in anything non-sexual. If you suspect you have a problem, read on for some signs that you might be a sex addict.

• You’re leading a double life

• You frequently seek out sexual material

• You’re compromising your personal relationships

• You seek out explicit sexual adventures

• You get into trouble with the law

• You have negative feelings about your behavior

Dealing With Sexomnia

I started dating this guy. It's been less than a week. He got drunk last night and stayed the night. He wanted to mess around with me, but I wouldn't. He tried and realized that I wasn't going to change my mind, so we went to sleep. When I woke up at 7:30 a.m. his jeans were off and he was masturbating. He had previously put his hand down the back of my pants, but since my back was turned, I thought nothing of it. When I saw what he was doing I freaked out, got up and left the room.

He said he was sleeping, and doing this in his sleep. Possible or not? I don't see how it would be possible. To take your jeans off and do that, just seems like a lot of trouble for someone who is sleeping.